Complicate Me
by propertyofjanerizzoli
Summary: When a game of truth or dare makes them let go of their inhibitions, an end of semester celebration at a cabin turns into a romantic getaway for Jane and Maura. College AU.
1. Best Friends Week

**A/N: I'm in a holiday mood and I felt like writing a smutty little tale. This one is only going to be seven chapters, one for each day they're at the cabin, but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless. :)**

* * *

Fifteen weeks, four days, and six hours had passed since Maura had moved into the same BCU dorm room as Jane and, within that timeframe, they had gone from strangers to best friends to something that neither of them were ready to define despite the amount of times they had kissed as a result of too much alcohol and petty relationship drama or ex-relationship drama now that Jane and Casey were no longer together. Maura knew the real reason behind Jane and Casey's breakup was because he was moving too quickly for her, but deep in her heart _she_ wanted to be the reason for their breakup. The girls in the next room fawned over Casey when they saw pictures of him in his uniform and they'd ask Jane questions about what it was like to be a soldier's girlfriend, but while they were all hanging onto every detail about Jane and Casey's relationship, Maura found herself having a blasé attitude toward Jane's relationship stories. She was supposed to be her best friend, her confidante, but with every mention of Casey, Maura had to control every urge to tell Jane that their breakup was long overdue and she'd be better off with someone who loved her for who she was and not who she could be.

"I would have been Jane Jones," Jane said while sitting in the passenger seat of Maura's Prius en route to their private getaway for the next week, a cabin that Maura's parents let them use so they could celebrate the end of their first semester of freshman year. "No, I wouldn't have. I'd have kept my last name because Jane Jones sounds like the name of a '50s housewife, which is what he wanted me to be."

Those were the first words Jane had spoken throughout the entire drive and Maura was grateful to hear something that wasn't the sound of Jane rapidly typing on her laptop. She had a take-home final in the form of an eight-page essay to work on and why she waited until the last possible minute to work on it was beyond Maura. "What made you think of being Jane Jones?" Maura asked for the sake of keeping the conversation going.

"An email that he sent me," Jane responded, her eyes still fixated on her computer screen. "One of my friends from high school said that guys in the military tend to move faster in relationships than guys who aren't, but proposing to me and giving me an ultimatum, really? We never even talked about marriage and never did I tell him that I wanted to be his eighteen-year-old housewife. If someone rejects your marriage proposal because they aren't ready for marriage and you really truly loved them, you wouldn't break up with them. You'd wait for them, right?"

"Right," Maura agreed.

"You don't say marry me or it's over," Jane said as she started to type again. "Don't worry, I'm not replying to his email. I'm still trying to write this essay on the American Revolution."

"How hard can it be?" Maura quipped. "Anything is better than your midterm essay―' _Christopher Columbus: Superfraud._ "

"I'm proud of that essay," Jane smiled at her. "Considering I wrote it while drunk."

" _Obviously._ You started the essay with, ' _Buckle your seatbelts because I'm about to take you on the ride of your life._ ' I'm still surprised that your grammar and spelling were correct and you received a B on that essay."

"Professor Harris called it witty and refreshing," Jane pointed out. "Did I ever mention how glad I am that your parents bought you a Wi-Fi hotspot?" Moments later, Jane lightly slammed her hand on her keyboard. "We got to take a vote between a take-home final and an in-class final and, can you believe most of the class wanted a take-home final? Why do people think these are better? You have to type eight-pages with works cited, but an in-class final is just three hours of short answer questions and you're done. I think the people that vote for take-home finals are the ones that never did any of the assigned reading."

When they left BCU, Jane's essay was halfway completed and Maura was surprised that she was able to finish the rest of her essay and the works cited page by the end of their two-hour drive to the cabin. A year had passed since the last time Maura had visited the cabin and, because her parents weren't due to meet her there for another week, she was surprised to see how festive and welcoming the cabin looked with multi-color lights wrapped around the columns on the porch and a fully-illuminated Christmas tree visible from one of the front windows.

"This is so beautiful," Jane said when they pulled into the driveway. "When you invited me to your cabin in the woods, I imagined it'd be all creepy and desolate like a horror movie, but this place is even bigger than my house _and_ there's neighbors."

"There's also a town center three miles away," Maura pointed out. "My parents told me they fully-stocked the fridge and the pantry, but if you want to go out for dinner or coffee sometime this week, I know the best places to go."

"Like on a date?" Jane winked at her.

Although she knew Jane was kidding, Maura felt her heart skip a beat. "I can't believe you fit all of your clothes, shoes, and accessories into one luggage bag," Maura said in an attempt at changing the subject.

"What accessories?" Jane snickered. "We're at a cabin and it's probably going to be snowing half the time. Besides, you said I didn't have to pack toiletries or anything like that because your parents already had that stuff here. The only accessories I'm going to need are the beanie and the scarf I already have on and I doubt I'm going to need more than one pair of shoes."

Jane rolled her luggage and one of Maura's into the cabin while Maura took one of her own and Jane's laptop case. Now that Jane's essay was officially submitted to her professor, Maura began to worry about how they were going to spend their week and whether or not Jane would be entertained. While on campus, they had extracurricular activities and assignments to keep them busy, but now that their semester was over and they had absolutely no distractions, Maura hoped she'd be a good hostess.

After they put down their belongings, Maura noticed a letter on the coffee table. " _Your sister wanted the cabin decorated for your arrival. Call me when you read this so I know you've arrived safely._ ― _Mom_."

"It's even nicer inside," Jane said as she looked around the living room. "Where should I put my stuff?"

"I can sleep in my sister's room and you can sleep in my room," Maura suggested.

"Cailin is fourteen," Jane reminded her. "Do you really think she's going to want anyone, even you, sleeping in her room?"

"It's our only option. My parents don't like my sister and me using their bedroom and there's no guest bedroom," Maura pointed out.

"We can share a room. We've been doing that since August. I bet your room here is bigger than our dorm room."

Maura bit her bottom lip. "There's only one bed."

"And?"

"And...I just thought I'd mention that," Maura said nervously. She had hoped for afternoons at the coffee shop, nights spent raiding her parents' liquor cabinet, and maybe even a few snowball fights, but sharing a bed with Jane, although it had been on her mind since she suggested their week-long getaway, was not what she expected. "It's a queen-sized bed. There's room for both of us." Maura was caught off guard when she heard her friend laugh. "What's so funny?"

"You're acting like I'm trying to have sex with you or something. You're the one who had that cute girl in your bed at the beginning of the semester. _I_ should be worried about _you_ trying to put the moves on me."

"She was my girlfriend, not just a cute girl," Maura clarified. "At least she _was_ my girlfriend until she said she couldn't do a long-distance relationship."

"She's at NYU," Jane pointed out. "It's not like she's in another country. I've always said you deserve someone better than her."

 _Someone like you?_ Maura wanted to ask, but she didn't have the nerve. "I should call my mom."

* * *

As Jane took their belongings upstairs to Maura's bedroom, she began to think about how they had gotten to this point in their friendship when just three and a half months ago they were arguing over closet space. With the outrageous amount of money that BCU charged for tuition and housing, Jane expected individual closets like her friends had at other universities rather than the single closet for two students like BCU provided. Maura arrived at their dorm room first and took it upon herself to use three-fourths of the closet space. Jane (who lived a fifteen to twenty-minute drive from BCU, depending on traffic) brought significantly less clothing and shoes than Maura, but it was the principle of the situation that bothered Jane. "You didn't even know I was going to bring less clothing than you and you still took almost the entire closet," Jane argued. When Maura didn't relinquish the extra space, Jane knew they'd merely be roommates, not friends. That is, until Maura found a way to make it up to her with a bottle of Jack Daniels that she was able to smuggle in via a senior friend. It wasn't until a month later that the two of them worked up the nerve to actually drink it and they became friends while bonding over long-distance relationships and stories about their families. One shot turned into a few more and, before the end of the night, Jane had kissed Maura for the first time. It wasn't cheating as long as she was kissing a girl and not a guy―or so Jane tried reasoning with herself until she realized that, according to that logic, Maura was in fact cheating on her girlfriend by kissing her. The next morning, they agreed it was just a single kiss and it couldn't happen again and it didn't until just hours after Maura's girlfriend broke up with her.

"We're both just vulnerable right now," Jane had told Maura afterward. "You and your girlfriend just broke up and Casey and I are going through a rough patch." But she knew it was a lie. Her every fantasy was about Maura, especially when she was with Casey. As long as she closed her eyes, it was Maura touching her and it was _Maura_ who was inside her. Casey was the one physically present, but any pleasure she felt was because of Maura.

She only cried once after Casey ended their relationship, but not for the reason everyone assumed she was crying. She wanted Maura; she wanted her in a way that transcended her feelings and her desire for Casey (if she ever had any). It was Maura that she thought about while the warm water trickled down her body in the shower, her left hand rubbing her clit softly at first and then faster and harder until she felt her orgasm throughout her entire body. It was like nothing she had experienced before and the thought of actually experiencing that with Maura consumed Jane.

She knew that two women could have a happy, fulfilling relationship with each other. It was evident by Maura's parents―two women who had met in college in the mid-'80s and had stayed together since then despite the fact that their parents' disapproved of their relationship. Maura was the first and only girl Jane had been attracted to, but it wasn't a same-sex attraction that was the reason Jane had cried―it was an attraction to the best friend she had ever had.

 _This is going to be a long week_ , Jane thought as she looked at the bed they'd be sharing. _Control yourself._


	2. Truth or Dare

**A/N: Thanks so much for your comments and for adding this story to alerts. I really appreciate it and I hope you're having a happy December. :)**

* * *

Every year for the past ten years, the Isles family spent the two weeks of Maura and Cailin's winter break at their cabin. Building snowmen with her little sister, drinking hot chocolate by the fireplace, and opening gifts on Christmas morning were some of Maura's fondest childhood memories and she couldn't wait to make new memories at the cabin with Jane.

It took two weeks of convincing for Maura's parents to let her and Jane have the cabin to themselves for a week, mainly because they were against their daughter spending a week alone with a girl that they had yet to meet.

" _She's my best friend," Maura constantly tried to tell her mom, but she was far from convinced._

" _You talk about her in a way most girls wouldn't talk about their best friend," her mom, Hope, pointed out. "I'm going to tell you a story. I wasn't in college yet, but I was in boarding school when I was assigned to the same dorm room as the girl who soon became my best friend."_

" _Then you fell in love with her and you've been together ever since." Maura had heard that story dozens of times and, as much as she loved hearing about how her parents met, she wasn't in the mood to hear her mom use it as a way to make a point about her and Jane. "Mom, she's not my girlfriend," Maura hesitated. "But I'd like her to be."_

" _We'll let you use the cabin under one condition: we get to meet her before she leaves."_

" _You can meet her," Maura responded. "Just promise not to plan our wedding, already."_

" _I won't," Hope promised. "Oh, and Maura? If you two are going to do anything, please stay out of our bedroom and off of the couch, the coffee table, and any other surface that isn't in your room."_

Maura had never disobeyed her parents, but the second day of her vacation made her question exactly how obedient she was going to be.

Their plan was to get up early so they could eat a light breakfast and go out for coffee, but her exhausted best friend slept through her alarm and didn't wake up until noon. Jane hadn't slept regularly throughout the past week due to her hectic final exam schedule, so Maura decided to let her sleep while she scrolled through different social media apps and read a few articles online. Social media was abuzz with parties and other get-togethers that her friends and acquaintances from high school were hosting now that they were home from their first semester of college and, although they looked fun, they didn't compare to being alone with Jane―even if Jane was fast asleep.

Jane was apologetic when she woke up, which Maura found endearing even if both of them had expected her to sleep in. Maura had Jane's morning routine memorized and it wasn't uncommon for her best friend to sleep through breakfast unless it was absolutely necessary for her to wake up early. On those days, Maura would go to the dining hall with girls from a nearby room and bring Jane fruit and yogurt for her to eat when she woke up. Jane would have preferred bacon and eggs or pancakes, but since students weren't allowed to take hot food to go, she knew Jane was grateful for something light to eat while the dining hall transitioned from breakfast to lunch. Their second day at the cabin was no different. They ate granola bars from the pantry to hold them over until late afternoon when they decided to make dinner.

With nowhere in particular to go, the girls decided to change back into their pajamas after they ate and, it was at that moment that Maura decided to make some Christmas-themed cocktails for them that she had watched her mother make the previous year. Until then, Jane and Maura had drank poorly mixed drinks at parties and taken shots in their dorm room, but neither shots nor mixed drinks with copious amounts of alcohol and a bit of juice or soda poured into them would suffice. She didn't want a sloppy, drunken makeout session with Jane. Her best friend had gotten out of a bad relationship and, that night, Maura had every intention of showing Jane that her soulmate had been with her the whole time.

They sat by the fireplace and sipped their martinis while they talked casually about what they should do the next day. Their evening was going just as Maura had expected until it was either the heat from the fireplace or the liquid courage from the martini that made Jane remove the flannel pajama shirt she was wearing. She was now wearing nothing more than flannel pajama pants and a bralette and, although Maura had seen her show more skin during her workouts or while clad in nothing but her underwear after taking a shower, it was the first time Maura felt as if Jane was doing this in hopes that she'd get her attention.

She imagined what it would be like to go beyond the fantasies and actually have sex with Jane. Who―if either―would be more dominant? Would there be the awkwardness during sex that happens when two people transition from friends to lovers? Was the feeling mutual for Jane or would sex bring about the end of their friendship? With that last thought in mind, Maura finished the rest of her martini and went to the kitchen to make a second one for her and Jane.

"Where did you learn to make these?" Jane asked as Maura handed her a second martini.

"My parents always host a Christmas party for their friends at the beginning of December and, because my mother can't cook, she makes drinks instead," Maura explained. "My mom cooks for hours before the party, my mother makes drinks, and Cailin and I play hostess to their friends' kids. They're not kids, actually. They're teenagers. My first kiss was at one of their parties when I was fourteen. He and I were standing under the mistletoe."

"That's cute," Jane smiled at her. "I wanna go to your family's Christmas party next year."

"So you can kiss me under the mistletoe?"

Jane nearly choked on her martini. "No. I mean, not no as in _no_ but no as in no."

"What?"

"I'd kiss you if you wanted me to."

"I think my parents want you to," Maura giggled. "They think we're a couple."

"We're not?" Jane quipped. "Am I just a fling for you?"

Maura dramatically clutched her hand to her heart and gasped. "I didn't mean for you to find out this way."

"I'm glad they let me stay here with you," Jane told her once their laughter had died down. "It's nice to get away from everything for a week."

"Getting away is one of the reasons why my parents bought this cabin," Maura explained. "Both of my parents came from wealthy, conservative families. They cared more about image and tradition rather than their own daughters and, when my parents came out to their families when they were in their twenties, they were disowned. This happened before Cailin and I were born. We've never even met our grandparents or our aunts and uncles and cousins. It's always been just the four of us and, since we don't have to worry about travelling to Vermont to visit my mom's family or to England to visit my mother's family, we come to this cabin for two weeks and spend the whole time enjoying each other's company because we don't have any of the obligations that come with having an extended family."

Jane took a sip of her martini. "You're so lucky. It sucks that your parents got disowned, but do you know what I would give to not have to spend Christmas with my extended family, especially some of my cousins?"

"From what I've heard of my aunts and uncles, I'm glad it's just the four of us," Maura added. "However, if I'm in a relationship, my boyfriend or girlfriend could spend the holidays with us. The same applies to Cailin once she's old enough to date."

"Did you bring your ex-girlfriend here when you were together?" Jane asked and Maura detected the slightest hint of jealousy.

"Madison was never here," Maura responded. "Our relationship wasn't that serious. I'd only bring a girl here if I was serious about her."

"Oh," Jane responded and Maura couldn't tell if her comment had gone over Jane's head or if she changed the subject because she was nervous. "I know someone who will be spending the holidays with you soon. My brother Tommy doesn't shut up about Cailin. They added each other on Snapchat. It's weird."

Maura gave her a confused look. "They've never even met."

"He saw a picture I posted of me and you on Instagram a month ago and then went to your page and saw a pic of you and Cailin and then found Cailin's page and told her she was hot and they've been following each other on Instagram and sending each other snaps since then."

"Why hasn't Cailin told me? More importantly, why didn't _you_ tell me?"

"Because."

"Because of what?"

"Because," Jane averted her eyes. "It's embarrassing."

"They're high school freshmen and our younger siblings," Maura reminded her. "Everything they do is going to be an embarrassment to us. That can't be the reason you didn't tell me."

Jane looked at her phone on top of the coffee table. "Speaking of family, I promised my mom I'd call her."

"Jane."

"I'll be right back."

* * *

Her mother hadn't actually asked her to call, but Jane needed a way out of the awkward situation she was in, so she decided to give her mom a call. Her intention was to stay on the phone just long enough for Maura to forget about their conversation, but much to Jane's chagrin, her mother kept her on the phone for over half an hour as she asked Jane about what they had planned for the week, told her every detail about the holiday preparation she was doing, and asked if she was okay after her breakup with Casey.

Jane knew what people expected―she was supposed to be devastated about losing the love of her life. She did love Casey or so she told him, but she loved him as her high school sweetheart and the more people she met in college the more she realized all she had in common with Casey was their past. She wanted to be devastated about their breakup, but all she felt was nervousness because of her feelings for Maura.

When she returned to the living room, Maura was waiting for her by the fireplace and scrolling through pics she had taken on her phone. She was wearing a short, pink nightie, not too different from the ones she usually wore except she could have sworn Maura pulled the nightie down to make it look a little more low-cut.

"What happened to your tank top and pajama pants?" Jane asked, trying to remain calm.

"This is more comfortable."

But Jane expected that wasn't the real reason Maura changed into the nightie. "What do you wanna do now?"

"We can play Truth or Dare," Maura suggested.

"With only two people? We'd only pick truth. Even if we did pick dare, what kind of dares would we have each other do?" Jane ranted. "I didn't even know people played Truth or Dare after junior high."

Maura laughed. "Are you afraid to play?"

"No," Jane said, defensively. "That game is for twelve-year-olds." Jane actually didn't mind Truth or Dare, but the thought of playing it with Maura sent her into panic mode. _What is she going to have me admit?_

"Truth or Dare?" Maura asked.

"Dare," Jane said nervously. Had they been playing with a group of people, Jane knew someone would have dared her to kiss Maura, but since it was just the two of them, she figured dare was her safest option.

"I dare you to…" Maura paused to think of a dare. "I dare you to go outside and sing a Christmas song as loud as you can."

The dog in the nearby cabin started to bark and a teenage boy recorded a video of her that she knew would eventually be posted on youtube, but Jane completed the dare without any hesitation. _I'm glad I remembered to put a hoodie on before going outside._

"Why haven't you taken your hoodie off?" Maura asked when they were sitting by the fire again.

"Why do you want it off?" Jane teased.

"I was just wondering."

She removed her hoodie and noticed how discombobulated her friend had become. "Truth or Dare?" Jane asked.

"Truth."

"I'm not going to make this easy for you," Jane smirked. "What was the best sex you've ever had?"

"I didn't know we were going to take Truth or Dare to that level," Maura blushed. It wasn't the first time they had talked about sex, so Jane wasn't sure why Maura had become so shy. "The best sex I've ever had was with my ex-girlfriend on my 18th birthday. Now that I was officially an adult, my parents let her stay over and we spent the entire night trying different positions. She had me―"

"I don't need to know the rest," Jane interrupted. She thought she'd be able to listen to Maura's sex stories, but imagining another girl have sex with Maura made her more jealous than she'd like to admit.

"Sorry," Maura averted her eyes. "Truth or dare?"

Jane hesitated, "...truth."

"Why do Tommy and Cailin's crushes on each other make you feel embarrassed?"

"They just do," Jane snapped at her.

"Why?"

"Because a fourteen-year-old can say what I can't," Jane blurted out. "He's never even met Cailin and he can tell her he has a crush on her. I could never do that."

"It's easier at that age," Maura began. "He also had nothing to lose. If Cailin didn't feel the same way, they wouldn't have to see each other."

"What are we even talking about?"

Maura shook her head. "I'm not sure."

"Truth or dare?" Jane asked just to change the subject.

"Truth."

"Why did you bring me here?"

"I brought you here because you're my best friend."

"Why did you _really_ bring me here?"

"That's a follow up question," Maura pointed out. "You can't ask follow up questions. You'll have to wait until my next turn and that's only if I choose truth."

"Maura," Jane groaned.

"Truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Have you ever thought about anyone else while having sex with Casey?"

"Yes."

"Who?"

"You said we couldn't ask follow up questions," Jane reminded her. "Truth or dare?"

"Dare."

Jane knew she chose dare to avoid having to answer her follow up question, so she decided to find a loophole. "Okay, I dare you to tell me why you really brought me here."

"I didn't want it to happen in our dorm room."

"It?"

"Admitting our feelings for each other."

"Or me admitting how much I love that nightie on you."

Maura smiled at her. "I can say the same about that bralette you're wearing."

"To answer your follow up question from earlier, it was you I thought about while having sex with Casey."

"What did you imagine me doing to you?"

Jane noticed that they hadn't moved in any closer to each other nor had they reached for each other's hands. "I don't want this to be some kind of friends with benefits thing and I don't think I'm ready for sex even though I've never wanted anyone as bad as I want you right now."

Maura grabbed Jane's hand. "I'd never want us to be friends with benefits. We don't have to rush into anything and we don't have to have sex anytime soon, or at all."

"When I said I'm not ready, I meant not tonight," Jane smiled at her. "I know we only have a light buzz if anything, but I don't want anything we do for the first time to be alcohol induced. We've never even kissed each other while sober."

"As difficult as it'll be to sleep in the same bed as you tonight, I'm glad we're going to wait."

"Just tonight, though," Jane reiterated. "As of tomorrow, we can do everything we've always fantasized about doing."


End file.
